It's here........

Mel has just returned home from work looking deathly pale and saying she feels like she's about to keel over. Given that a number of her colleagues at the hospital where she works have had swine flu then the chances are that she has too.

I'm waiting for her to retire to bed and then I'll seal the room she's in and start mopping down anything she might have touched.......not really, obviously. However, if she has got swine flu then I will get it too as I am like a living petri dish. Diseases, bugs and viruses dine out on me. They positively thrive in my company and cherish the moments we are together. In addition, being a man the symptoms are much worse for me than for others. A minor cold can lay me low for days and 24 hour care becomes an absolute necessity. Except my nurse will not be available, she will be ill too. I'm off to ring an ambulance.............